Update on My (Margaret's) Health

As you probably have read through our previous posts, I had a miscarriage back in September.  We had a pathology done on the baby's tissue to find out why our baby died.  Our doctor informed us not only that our baby was a boy, but that I had a partial molar pregnancy, something that occurs in 1 out of 1,000 pregnancies.  The genetic makeup of our baby boy was so abnormal that this type of baby never survives.  It was encouraging to us to find that it wasn't something that I did wrong or that could have been prevented.  We also found out that this isn't a genetic condition so the chances of it occurring a second time are very rare.

There is a slight chance that if the baby's tissue wasn't completely removed during the D and C procedure that I had on 9/16, the tissue could invade my body, similar to a cancer.  It is my understanding that I would then have to have chemotherapy to fix the problem.  In order to monitor this, our doctor has told us that we have to wait 6 months from the time that my pregnancy hormone levels reaches a negative count of 5 or less.  This also means that we are unable to try to conceive another baby until this testwork is completed.  As you could imagine, it was very difficult to swallow all the information that we heard.  Six months seemed like an eternity to wait.  Not to mention, I would have to continually go back to the doctor to have my blood drawn.  And if anyone knows me well, I have a serious fear of needles/blood/medical stuff.

This is probably more information than most would like to know, but I'm going to include this for anyone who comes across my blog that may be going through the same thing and would like the details.

Found out I had a miscarriage on 9/14
D and C performed on 9/16
Here are my blood results:
Date - Count
10/10 - 17.8
10/24 - 5.9 (so close!!)
10/31 - 4.1 Praise The Lord - 6 months from now

Now that I have reached "negative," I have to wait 6 months before we can try to have another baby again.  I had my first monthly appointment on 11/28 (count of 1.2).  My next appointment will not be until after Christmas - probably around December 28 or 29.

During this time, we are praying that God would knit together a healthy baby once we do start trying again.  We are finding ourselves encouraged by the Bible - 2 Samuel 12:23, Psalm 56, Psalm 139:15-16, Psalm 147:3-5, Lamentations 3 (especially verses 31 - 33), Isaiah 40-41, Isaiah 43, Isaiah 51, Romans 8:28, 2 Corinthians 1:3-11, to name a few.  Please continue to pray with us as we wait on God's timing.

Whate'er My God Ordains Is Right

Last Wednesday, Curtis and I went to our third OB appointment to check on Baby McD.  Thinking that I had now surpassed the first trimester, I found myself more calm about this appointment than I had been at the previous two.  When they searched for the baby's heartbeat with the doppler device, I was told that she was not able to find a consistent heartbeat and she would have another woman come to check.  I tried to think positively during the 30-minute waiting period, but we couldn't help but start to think that perhaps something was wrong.  One of the RUF hymns that Curtis and I sang often in college - "Whate'er My God Ordains Is Right" came to mind during this time:

1. Whate’er my God ordains is right,
Holy His will abideth.
I will be still whate’er He does,
And follow where He guideth.
He is my God,
Though dark my road.
He holds me that I shall not fall
Wherefore to Him I leave it all

2. Whate’er my God ordains is right,
He never will deceive me
He leads me by the proper path,
I know He will not leave me
I take, content,
What He hath sent
His hand can turn my griefs away
And patiently I wait His day

3. Whate’er my God ordains is right,
Though now this cup in drinking
May bitter seem to my faint heart,
I take it all unshrinking
My God is true,
Each morn anew
Sweet comfort yet shall fill my heart
And pain and sorrow shall depart

4. Whate’er my God ordains is right,
Here shall my stand be taken
Though sorrow, need, or death be mine,
Yet I am not forsaken
My Father’s care
Is round me there
He holds me that I shall not fall
And so to Him I leave it all

If you wanted to hear a portion of this song (verses 1 & 4), you can find here.  I knew that whatever happened, God was still in control.  If there was a problem, we would walk through this trial knowing that the Lord would carry us through it.  The Lord has always been faithful in various trials that Curtis and I have both gone through individually and as a couple, so we had that confidence.

Unfortunately, we found that the baby had passed away when they performed an impromptu-ultrasound.  I had to have surgery (D&C) to remove the baby's remains on Friday.

It has been a very hard week as we have had to come to grips with the reality that we will not be having a baby in February.  We didn't realize that we could love someone that we've never met as much as we loved this baby!  We prayed often that this baby would never know a day without the Lord, so we hope that one day we will get to meet him or her when we arrive in heaven.  At this time, we are in need of prayer as we mourn the loss of our little one.